One-der Land Baby!

Well, after a crazy few days of vacation, I stepped on the scale today and discovered I had slipped quietly into One-der Land! This is the first time since I think high school that I weigh under 200 lbs. It wasn't too hard to do this week because I have been having a hard hard time with my band. My body has switched over to not wanting to eat anything before 1 or 2 p.m. If I try to eat anything before that time, it gets stuck and comes back up. Not fun- especially if I am truly feeling hungry. But I try to supplement with plenty of coffee and water and sometimes I can get yogurt down if I feel like I'm going to lose it if I don't get something in my belly.

Spent the week running around like crazy with my best girl Valerie and her 2 yr old boy Evan. It was QUITE the workout just keeping up with Evan. He's an adorable tornado. I really enjoyed spending an extended period of time around him. It was neat to watch how he'd pick things up quickly or try to repeat what you were saying or singing. At one point we had him singing some Kanye West. (get down girl, go 'head get down)

Anyway I managed to drag my sorry ass out of bed only ONCE the whole week and go walking. It was a nice walk and it definitely smelled like Colorado- sounded like Colorado (doves cooing in the trees). 

Looking forward to getting back to my regular schedule. I'll go walking tomorrow at some point to meditate and stretch out. I'm also going to see if I can reschedule my hair appointment.

I'm exhausted and going to bed now. Take Luck!

J

Teeny-Tiny Bites

Well, still have cranky stoma. Some days are better than others though, so I'm still trying to figure it out. 

Monday was ok- some salmon dip on 2 rye krisps for breakfast, americano, latte, then some meatball soup which was ok, Dinner went ok. Husband and I went to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse for the first time. It was SUPER swanky, which translates to SUPER expensive, but the experience was well worth it. I really enjoy fine dining and trying new flavors and things I wouldn't normally try. Anyway, no getting stuck on nice expensive dinner- although I was eating very carefully and taking little bites.

Tuesday was ok too. Salmon dip on 3 rye krisp for breakfast, americano, latte, some meatloaf for lunch which got stuck- so I had a protein drink on hand. Got stuck on smoked almonds much later on in the afternoon-but not the almond m&ms that were sitting out. It is SO frustrating that I don't get stuck on things like chips or chocolate-the things that I WANT to get stuck and have to avoid at all costs. Got home and ate some leftover steak and that went fine again. Wasn't feeling very well and went to bed early.

Today, salmon dip breakfast, latte, americano, was super busy all day and had a late lunch-meatball soup, which went down fine- and I was able to eat 1 and a half cups of it or so- which is a big portion- so I need to pay good attention to my portion sizes from here on out-if they are growing- I need a fill. Tonight, went to class and it was the last class- so it was pizza & beer night- neither of which I can ingest- so I sipped a Pellegrino orangina and nibbled on a granola bar from my bag. Got home late (10:30 or so) and was feeling ravenous. Still had some more leftover steak to eat and was upset about my day at work and was talking to Matt about it- and wasn't paying attention to what I was doing and was eating BIG bites and of course, I got stuck. But I felt like I still needed to eat because I was hungry to I just kept eating smaller and smaller bites- but it wasn't getting better.

I ended up barfing up my SUPER expensive steak, then tried to eat some pecans, NO- barfed them up too. Then I tried to eat some Raisin Bran and milk thinking- soft food- NO- barfed that up too. SO I gave up and drank a cup of coconut chai tea & milk which really soothed my cranky tummy- then was able to eat a snack cup of sugar-free tapioca pudding and keep that down. I called it a night- what a shitty dining experience.

So the lessons learned from this week are: 

PAY ATTENTION to how you are eating- really BE there and watch what you are doing.

Small, toddler-sized bites are best

CHEW and chew and chew until there is nothing that can get stuck

Regardless of the sticking issues- avoid the liquid calories at all costs. 

Soft food if you can combine it with some solid; salmon dip on krisp bread

Pay attention to your soft stop signals- this is why you must PAY ATTENTION when you eat!

Tomorrow I plan on salmon dip for breakfast- am out of meatball soup (which was an EXCELLENT recipe by the way)- so will have to try meatloaf again- TINY BITES. We'll see how it goes. Maybe if I do a little meatloaf and then a few green beans. Protein then produce. Gotta get back to the basics.

I wonder if I've lost any weight this week. Since I haven't been able to eat so well- and I've been working out- maybe I have.

Well... best get to bed. I have a long day ahead and then I have to PACK for my trip to see my GIRL!!

WOOHOO!

XO

J

Barf-o-matic

That's right, it slices, it dices, it barfs up everything you throw at it! It's the amazingly cranky, super picky, not-eating-anything-you-feed-me stoma! It's my fault really, I tried to feed it a tortilla. I figured if I grilled it and made it really crunchy I might be able to get away with it, but no fooling the cranky stoma. I barfed up what I could and tried some vegetable soup, and it didn't want that either (which is really unusual). I have given up on eating. Just drinking a latte now. Hopefully it won't want to fuss about that too.

I'm 2 days post-op from kidney stone surgery. Fun fun fun! It's been one long drugged-out day with tiny pieces of night woven into it. I'm exaggerating, it's actually been fine. I've been on vicodin regularly, but I'm in my right mind for the most part. I've just been napping a lot, and when I'm not napping, I'm working on my homework or my portfolio pieces. So far so good.

Eating has been uneventful till today. Yesterday was apple & peanut butter- got stuck, couldn't eat it, then ate a few grapes- those went ok, ate some soup, crackers. No big whoop. This morning at 7 I was ravenously hungry, I had some yogurt with raisin bran mixed in, and usually, I do fine with that- it's got lots of fiber so it keeps me satisfied- but I got distracted by my email and it sat for too long- it turned into a big lump of cement in my bowl. I had to toss it out. I started feeling crappy again and went back to bed at 8:30 or so.

One sucky thing about this recovery period is not being able to go on my walks. It really is uncomfortable to walk with this stent in. I think I get to take it out tomorrow. I wish I could take it out now now now! It doesn't hurt, but is uncomfortable and makes me feel like I have to pee all the time. That's no fun.

Anyway, I guess I just wanted to post something so I could bitch- at least that's how it looks to me. I'll take another whack at eating something in a few hours.  Stupid cranky stoma.

XO

Jha

KidneySaurus Rex

Okay, it's 20 after 5 in the morning, give a girl a break- I couldn't think of ONE title to put in there. I suppose it is appropriate as I am going in this morning to have surgery on a stuck kidney stone. It's been such a weird and random health event for me. Had the stone about a month ago, (THE WORST PAIN EVER IN MY LIFE) and then have been trying to pass it since then. Not so much with the passing. It seems my body finds a good looking jewel and wants to keep it. I'm feeling a little nervous, but mostly just tired. Slept like shit last night. I was awake every 2 hours or so. I think I was worried about missing my alarm or something. Honestly, I think I slept better the night before my band surgery. Ironic huh?

So life with the band has been good. I broke down and got another fill after over a month being at the same place. I just wasn't feeling like I needed an adjustment.. was satisfied with small portions... BUT I started looking for food again at night. So that's a red flag that maybe things aren't as tight as they need to be. I got another .25 cc and that brings me to 6 total. (my APS holds 10) I'm doing great on my loss- down 60 pounds officially! I feel so good and so confident. It's like a whole new me. I am grateful for everything I have, but I am especially grateful to have this experience. It's been awesome.

On the barfing front, things have been busy. It seems the things my band will tolerate changes from day to day. I seem ok with broccoli again, scrambled eggs are okay as long as I chew well. Lately smoked almonds have been giving me trouble, banana was giving me trouble, noodles are a no-go, french fries are also not working, and last night I ate the top off a piece of hawaiian pizza and that got stuck almost instantly. So it's just trial and error at this point. I know to steer clear of breads and pasta and I'll wing it with everything else.

I bought two skirts this weekend- SIZE 12 baby! Ow! It's amazing. I'm able to wear standard size hosiery again, and normal tshirts (size L) from Old Navy. Last weekend, I went out dancing with the girls and I wore my jeans and a tank top with the built in shelf bra- spaghetti straps, and felt perfectly comfortable and good looking. It was like a miracle. I would NEVER have bared my arms like that before. 

I've been exercising every day now for months. It has become therapy or meditation for me. I need that time alone with my iPod and my sneakers. I need the chance to be alone, clear my head and just walk. If I am feeling especially energetic and goal-oriented, I will run. I've been running pretty frequently lately. It's good. I feel like I might need to ramp it up and get something to track my distance so I can push myself further. I try to pay attention to how many blocks I run, but I lose track and get kind of lost in the feeling of running. I can't explain. Anyway, may have to get that thing that Nike offers to go on my iPod. I'll look into it. 

Well, I best get moving for surgery. Leave here in 30 minutes.

Xo 

jen